Sand in my Pocket and Bali in my Belly

Seminyak isn’t just a place; it’s a vibe. It’s not too far fetched that you might find yourself rolling down the street on a motorbike in your new “Dior” shades after an hour long pampering and have only spent $20, including the ride. This is definitely a place you can live the life of luxury on a budget.

Now, you might be asking, aren’t you just exploiting people if locals are providing a fantastic hour-long massage for only $10? My assessment is no. Massages seem to be an integral part of the culture here in Bali, and as long are you are going to the well-lit, main-road places, things should be on the up-and-up. Just be sure to leave a nice tip. You can absolutely find places to spend more, but those tend to be at the resorts.

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Now, about those motorbikes. Riding on one is basically a rite of passage here, but don’t let the cool factor fool you. Bali’s streets are a maze of scooters, trucks, and the occasional rogue chicken. It’s part chaos, part adventure, and entirely unforgettable. Pro tip: if you want to ride one yourself (also cheap), start slow, hug the left side of the road, and don’t attempt if you’ve just come from KU DE TA after one too many espresso martinis.

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Speaking of………. KU DE TA, the mothership of Bali beach clubs. It’s where sun-kissed loungers morph into cocktail-sipping night owls! It was such a welcome break from the India mayhem. We were able to sit, drink, listen to music, and play cards. This pretty much sums up the tone of the day: Owen is chilling and dancing to music while getting some sun rays:

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The food was fantastic, and we were lucky enough to snag reservations at their fancy SALTLICK restaurant. After booking the reservation, the booking stated they don’t allow children under 14. While at the club, I accidentally walked in on the staff meeting being lead by the uncomfortably attractive head chef Jeremy. I asked if I could bring my children to the adult only restaurant. He was incredibly kind and said, “no problem.” I assured him that if they acted up, I would throw them over the balcony.

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Well kids must have been pretty well-behaved because they allowed them in the kitchen after dinner! The staff were so accommodating in every way, and I couldn’t think of a better way to end a perfect day than this perfect dinner.

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No trip to the Bali coast would be complete without some surf lessons, and that’s exactly what we scheduled for the next day. Our surfing coach, Matteo, was a true legend, with the hair and everything. While he might have been the nicest guy we have ever met, I don’t think I personally could have disappointed him more. He must have screamed, “STAND UP, STAND UP, STAND UP, ahhhhhh, you have to stand up??!!” about 35 times. Turns out my body doesn’t “stand up” on boards and I don’t do squats correctly.

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However, he was literally ready to put Owen on a surf team. This boy was a natural. His form was perfect. He started riding waves on the first go and took to it like a damn native Hawaiian.

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Jeff was by far 2nd best. With Andre only completing a couple rounds, developing a board rash, and then stating he is more of a climber.

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Of course, no Seminyak trip is complete without embracing some island glam. Enter: hair braiding. Nothing makes you look more like a local than a good colorful hair braiding. I’ve never had extensions before, and I have to say, I loved it! I really felt like a full fledged surfer girl as long as I wasn’t on the board. Carrying the board, on the other hand, made me feel like I could fool anyone.

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Story time (WARNING GRAPHIC):

Now I want you to imagine getting your hair all done up, you had a great day surfing, and you go to grab some grub. You and your husband decide to eat at this place on the beach that looks pretty nice, but then your husband decides he doesn’t want to walk that far, and you agree. So you pick a randomly unresearched place that seems nice as you pass it on the street. This changes the course of the trip……..

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You get back to the room and, all of sudden, your belly looks like you might be 4-5 months pregnant. Everyone else feels fine. The cramping ensues and you make your way to the Hygiene Suite. After 15 minutes of intense cramping, you think a bath in the bubble bunker could make things better; perhaps calm things or help to move things along. Well, it certainly pisses off whatever is happening, and you rush to the loo-lagoon.

Next thing you know, you wake up bare as a jaybird, perpendicular on the toilet, with your head clearly being “softly” laid on the edge of the tub. As you start to try and process the world around, you notice a black spot, perhaps a bug, on the wall moving up and down repetitively. It looks odd and you start to question if you are dreaming or in the matrix.

You call for your husband who is busy watching nature shows with the boys. Eventually, he hears your soft whimper. He walks in to view the spread-eagle, Full-Monty, with amazing pink/blue braids hanging in the tub. In the most gentlemanly way, he covers you and helps you to sit up. In doing so, he activates the beast within.

Let’s just say, it was a very long, terrible, terrible, I might just die, night……..

Bali’s infamous Bali Belly (which I had NEVER heard of) is the plot twist no one asked for. It proceeded to haunt me (and the rest of the family in a much lighter version, think more Gremlins 2) for the rest of the Bali experience. I could not believe we got sick in Bali and not India.

Moving on! After a couple days of rest, I was ready to get back out there. I was excited I had survived my new diet. We decided to go to the restaurant from the originally planned “walk” a couple days later. They had live music, safe food, and we had a blast. Owen was so sweet, he asked if I would dance with him on the beach. He knows how much I love dancing and it was such a super special moment for us.

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This was just the first section of our trip! We have a surprise friend coming to visit in our next post!!!!